My exciting life with a house full of boys

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

No Plastic Surgeon After All

I'm getting older. Somethings about this aging process I really don't mind. But then there are others that I fear, dread, and am frankly beginning to experience.

My siblings and I all have a shared trait. We have bags and dark circles under our eyes. For me, as I get older it is getting worse. It doesn't matter how much sleep I've had, how many vitamins I've swallowed, the black eyes remain. I've tried eye creams, preparation H, ice packs, sleep, and many expensive cover up creams but inevitably people continue to ask me if and why I'm tired. I hate it.

As I am aging I have noticed that I don't have as many wrinkles as some of my peers have. Again genetics. Instead, I am sagging. You see, I have an extremely oily complexion. Always have. When I get a sun burned nose, it doesn't dry and peel. My layers of skin simply slide off. So instead of deep creases caused by wrinkles I am developing deep creases from sagging. (We are only talking about the face right now.)

Then there is my neck. You can always tell a woman's age by her neck. Kathy Lee Gifford should be the poster child for this. Her face looks great with the layers of paint on her face but look at her neck. That can't be hidden without a turtle neck. And now I am seeing it. Ever so slightly as I turn and the light hits me just right I have the beginning of a turkey neck. I am becoming my grandma.

These three things bother me, more so than my waist line, graying hair, or liver spots that are beginning to show up on my hands. I have seriously considered making an appointment with a plastic surgeon to see what can be done. Subtly of course. Until now. I think I have found the solution and I am so excited to try it out. Tell me what you think.

For those of you that have emailed me, called me and text me - IT'S A JOKE!